Tuesday, 24 May 2011

No Bad Bein a Scot

Ah've just come doon fae the Isle o Skye....It's late May and i didnae expect closed bridges, broken trees and a big fat lorry lyin on its side but shit like that happens when it blows a proper hoolie. Late May fir fuck sake and the scariest drive i've ever had. Aaaargh!

So ma hands and peepers were strugglin furiously to keep the bus on the road and ma mind wiz thinkin stuff this firra game o sodjers, i wanna move tae Goa. Made it back to base though to hook wi Mand an the Axminster firra coupla pints and as the beer slipped doon and the spraff flowed i slowly minded that it's really nane too shabby bein a Scot. And by 'Scot' i mean anyone livin in this wee spit o land in the north o Britain - many o the best yins mos def werenae born here.

Aye the weather's a challenge, the fitba's pish and there are societal challenges associated wi the politics o greed and religion. But maist cats i ken are cool as milk, we've got mair soul soothin scenery than you can shake a shitey stick at and we get the odd bit o barry news.

Like this pair:

Religion: the crusty auld Church o Scotland edges further and faster than many to the blindingly obvious realisation that it doesnae matter how consenting adults rub their rude bits the gither, if they wanna spread thon gospel pish that's good enough fir the Kirk. Check dis oot.

Whisky: not just the water of life, not just a massive earner for the (soon to be defunct) UK treasury, not just a means of employment for barley farmers, distillers, coopers, blenders, bottlers, drivers and erm tour guides but now also a potential source of biomass energy generation. Check oot dis. And that comes on top o dis from a year ago.

Aw guid i reckon.

PS time tae get ma camera back oot and chuck some snaps up here.


  1. Naldo ma man, ged tae see ye back. Ah wiz stertin tae think ye wir loast in the heelins.
    Ah the weather. We folk fae the isle ur guid aboot talkin aboot the weather an we ur oh the same opinion anaw. So yir right its May and the weather is crzyer thin a shit hoose rat. If this isnae global warmin thin all be fucked. The whiz kid an the talkin heids doon south ur still chunterin oot the same auld shite aboot aw bein well. Ah wid like tae see yon Cameron boy wi ah lightnin bolt up ees erse an a guid stiff northerly doon ees lumb.
    Ah hudnae cottoned oan tae the deal wi the same sex folk bein allowed tae hook up or the gay an lesbian ministers. Ah um a wee bit surprised at the kirk. It will make yir normal Sunday sermon jist a wee bit iffy if ye ken whit ah mean. How dae wi explain the mkain oh paradise tae the bairns a Sunday school? God created Adam an Adam or wiz it Eve an Eve. Oh its aw mixed up. Ah hate tae think aboot the Sodom an Gomorrah part oh the guid book it might jist huv tae be rewrittin in aw.
    But yir guid news wiz the left ovirs fae the auld aqua vitae. Ah aw fir that. Jist think oh whit a grand whiff it wid be when ye turn oan yir gas. The scots might jist take tae home cookin efftir aw!
    Keep yir bus runnin an carry oab bloggin.

  2. Good to see ye back mate. Missed yer jibberin.